Read the article: Finding Love

Forget getting hitched - just how are you supposed to go about meeting someone you really click with in the first place?

My partner has a lot of work and personal stresses at the moment (not to do with me) and he's lost any ability to deal with things going wrong. I don't mean he blames me - if he did, I'd know that was abusive. But when things go wrong he can't cope. A tiny thing is a complete catastrophe. This morning he howled the house down because he couldn't find his keys. He starts blaming himself for faults all out of proportion with anything, saying the universe or God is out to get him, and has on occasion self-harmed. I don't feel physically threatened but it is very distressing to witness. I try to be supportive but what this means most of the time is trying to fix everything before it becomes a problem, and then just managing the inevitable blowup. And trying to keep it all quiet. By the way he is in counselling. We tried couples therapy too but the therapist seemed to believe I was just overly controlling, because he seemed so normal in that situation. And I feel like I sound insane when I say these things. How did I even get here? So this is my dilemma: I feel like I have to be constantly on guard for triggers. I can't talk to friends about this because it seems so awful and I don't want them to know because I think they'll think less of me, so it becomes isolating. Sounds like abuse, right? But then I've started micro-managing his life, telling him to eat, making him put things in particular places, and even getting angry when he's obviously distressed. Am I abusing him?

- Jamie

My mother-in-law keeps dropping not-so-subtle hints that my husband and I should be having children. Explaining that neither of us are ready to (or even in the financial position to) consider having children hasn't worked. I have kept laughing it off but she is getting increasingly persistent. How do my husband and I tell her FIRMLY to back off without causing a rift?

- Rachel

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My boyfriend and I have been together for just over a year and he wants to move in together but I'm not sure that I'm ready. Is one year really enough time to become this serious? I don't want to rush into this but I don't want to hurt my boyfriend's feelings either.

- Jessica

Is it OK to date more than one person at a time? At the moment I go out most weekends with a certain man but it's not set in stone. I usually get a call on Thursday night asking if I'm free. This weekend another man asked me out to dinner. Is it considered unethical to date more than one person at a time these days? And if I go out with the second man, do I have to tell the first?

- Leanne

I recently met this guy and up until now it has been going well. But lately he has been very busy and now doesn't seem to have as much time for me. I don't think this is on purpose because he does make plans and if he breaks them he always has a reason. But my friends say that if he has time for his friends he should have time for me and that he is not making me a priority. They think that I should move on before I get attached. What do people think?

- Michelle