After dating for three years, J wants to move in together but I don't know if I can put up with his messy habits. He leaves his socks on the coffee table and never puts anything away. His father is the same and his mother just says that you have to accept that men are like that and pick up after them. J says my standards are too high and that he likes to be comfortable in his own house. He's perfect except for this but I don't want a lifetime of playing housemaid to a slob.

Distressed.

My wife has made it clear that she wants something really special for our anniversary. I don't know what she has in mind, because when I ask her she just says to surprise her. It's been a tough year and I haven't got much to spend, so a weekend away and expensive jewellery are out. If I get her the usual chocolates and flowers from the supermarket, she'll say I don't care about her enough. Help!

Desperate Dan.

I feel like I need more excitement in my life. There's nothing really wrong with our marriage but its boring and I feel like I'm losing myself. My friends say its just a mid-life crisis and I'll get over it but I want a new life. Is it fair to walk out when they've done nothing wrong?

Itchy Feet

My partner loves all things Mac. I'm a PC person and the way Mac people talk seem a bit w*nky. Can we build a life together with such a fundamental difference that raises at least one "superior" comment every day?

everyday pc user.

I hadn't planned on changing my name when I get married and thought my fiance was happy with that. But now we are both under pressure from family on both sides. His mother says it is a sign that I don't have enough commitment to the marriage if I'm not willing to give up my name and I feel like she is undermining me. My parents are not much better. Even those who I thought would support me in this decision are being non-committal - making comments like sometimes it's easier if you both have the same name, what about the children etc. They making me feel like I'm being unreasonable or selfish. I'm annoyed that my fiance is just saying he doesn't mind instead of providing support.